Kawakami Is Best Girlfriend
Are Orcs animals?

yourplayersaidwhat:

Context: we just killed an Orcs mother, a boy of 7, and our ranger wants to console him.

Ranger: I give him a coin, no, … Are Orcs animals or people

*Table eruptes in laughter*

DM: WHAT?!

Ranger: I want to animal handle the child.
*Rolls a 3*

DM: you slap the child on the head and he cries harder.

yourplayersaidwhat:

““I make camp” “Okay” “And I scream at the moon.” “You….scream at the moon…” “The moon deserves it.” “…..okay, roll intimidation.” “4” “The moon is unphased.” “You win this round…I go to sleep.” Player wakes up in the domain of Moon goddess. “HEARD YOU WAS TALKIN SHIT!””

— (via yourplayersaidwhat)

Humans Are Weird: Brain Fart

nonbinarygaymer:

 Zork’ak noticed Lyle first. She was standing in between two storage containers near the back of the room, her head down and her lower extremities bending and straightening opposite of one another.

 “Is she well?” Zork’ak asked Wren.

 She turned around, looking in Lyle’s direction. “She’s just thinking.”

 “That is an interesting pose to apply to thought processes.”

 “Lyle! You good?” Kai called out.

 Lyle’s head lifted, but her facial features were tightened, the skin over her eyes wrinkled and her mouth pulled into a line. “I can’t remember what I was doing.”

 “Just go back to your bench and then walk there again. It usually helps to jog your memory.”

 “She cannot remember her mission? Is this not a concern?”

 Wren smiled and touched Zork’ak’s lower extremity. “No. It’s a common thing.”

 “It is common for humans to simply forget a task.”

 “Well, it’s not like that.” Now Wren’s mouth pressed into a line. She leaned around Zork’ak to look towards the opposite side of the room. “Adam!” She gestured with her hand. “Come here.” Zork’ak shook xer head as Adam approached them. “I need help with an explanation.”

 Adam laughed. “Okay?”

 “Lyle’s have a memory lapse, a brain fart.”

 “It is concerning how Wren and Kai have dismissed an abnormality in typical human behavior.”

 “Oh, that is common.”

 “You simply forget your intended tasks? That appears to be quite an unusual behavior taking into consideration the amount of cognitive studies I have done with this group.”

 “We’re not experiments,” Wren said quietly, quickly turning towards her work.

 “I did not intend-“

 “No, it’s okay. I knew what you meant.”

 Zork’ak hesitated, wavering on whether to leave the topic unspoken or if she was bothered and wished to speak about it. She seemed upset, the way she was now ignoring Zork’ak and Adam.

 Adam expelled a harsh sound, a cough. It stalled Zork’ak’s indecisiveness. “It’s not just forgetting things randomly. It usually results when we intend on doing an immediate activity but were not focused enough on the task so we have forgotten it.”

  “That still seems to be grounds for re-evaluation.”

 He lifted a hand. “It just means that her brain wasn’t fully focused when she came to the conclusion that she needed things. We can kind of switch our brains off while we do tasks, ones that we are used to, and it causes thought processes to be forgotten as they were not really committed to memory.”

    “That is quite a hindrance.”

    Adam raised and dropped his shoulders. “Marginally. It’s never anything important.”

    Zork’ak nodded, looking down at Wren. She was scrolling through her tablet, randomly pausing to scrunch her facial features together. Xe leaned down. “Is there a problem?” Xe was careful to keep xer voice low.

    She waved her hand. “Lost my train of thought.”

    “Your w-”

    “My thought process. It was disrupted, and I have forgotten what I intended to do.”

    “In similarity with Lyle?”

    “Yeah. I was considering too many things at once.” She let out a long breath and stood up. “It’s about time for lunch anyway.”

    Zork’ak did not follow her immediately. Instead, xe looked to Adam. “Should I be concerned of her mental health?”

    “Nah. It really is a normal thing. I wouldn’t worry too much about it.”

    “You humans.” Xer eyes floated back to Wren’s retreating figure. “You cause me much confusion and concern.”

    Adam hit Zork’ak’s upper extremity, a sign of friendship that xe had learned. “We cause each other a lot of confusion, too. You get used to it.”

    Zork’ak pushed off the counter xe had been leaning against. “I do not believe I will. Not with her, at least.”

    “Yeah. Love will do that to you.”

    Zork’ak stopped. “Love?”

    “It’s when you care about someone a lot. Really intensely; more than you thought possible. It is really a big thing to say you love someone.”

    “And you think I love Wren?”

    Adam made the motion with his shoulders again. “Perhaps.” And then he guided Zork’ak towards the corridor.

medititemountain:

2002 commercial for Pokemon Ruby & Sapphire.

Rated E for Everyone, indeed.

I could never get that music off my head

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gudroo:

broke: being horny for isabelle

woke: respecting the loving relationship between isabelle and doge

fandomsandfeminism:

theredshirtwholived:

fandomsandfeminism:

lightningflashstudio:

fandomsandfeminism:

Teachers in states across the nation are going on strike to protest funding cuts for public education. But a Texas law is quashing talk of teachers here joining the walkouts.

The statute says any employees who “strike or engage in an organized work stoppage against the state or a political subdivision of the state” will lose all their “civil service rights, reemployment rights, and any other rights, benefits, and privileges the employee enjoys as a result of public employment or former public employment.”

This is against the first amendment???? Texas teachers need to sue the fucking state.

Our “associations” (because state employees don’t get unions) have been made completely toothless by years and years of “right to work” and other anti-union legislation. 

It’s real bad. It’s real real real bad. 

I fucking hate right to work laws. In my book, they’re more like “right to exploit the hell out of employees” laws.

You are correct. 

fried-fuzzy-pickles:

“Age is just a number” means senior citizens can still find love.

“Age is just a number” means middle-aged people can still find love.

“Age is just a number” means 30+ people can still find love.

“Age is just a number” is not an excuse to be a pedophile.

Nothing is an excuse to be a pedophile.

So don’t.

Just don’t.

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animentality:

iwouldlikeamuffinplease:

aplpaca:

animentality:

wildnymeria99:

animentality:

god twitter gives me the jitters.

there’s something about it that’s just disturbingly real.

like i can come here and spout whatever nonsense i want, and ya’ll will tolerate it.

twitter is like an alien world where i don’t know what’s gonna happen, if fucking ted cruz is gonna respond to me or what.

it’s nerve wracking, it’s too mainstream.

i prefer this bullcrap where no one knows anyone or what’s going on at any given time. 

But do u remember that time when a writer came at you here?

that’s true, but unlike twitter, i was only tumblr shamed.

and tumblr shaming doesn’t work on me because tumblr shaming is like if a group of furries came with signs to shame a filthy otaku. 

on twitter, it’s like JK Rowling is gonna slap me with some half assed white corporate feminism and have her drones of cult followers come to shit on me for speaking. 

or like blake shelton is gonna @ me for making fun of his music, and all of his fans are gonna light the fire under my feet. 

it’s way different, being controversial on a mainstream media site.

tumblr’s a cesspit of stupidity, but it’s an obscure and strange cesspit of stupidity.

twitter’s a little too real.

trump and obama can have a rap battle on twitter and make it a part of us history.

tumblr isn’t the same way.

we all die in obscurity on tumblr, and i prefer it. 

twitter feels like im in full sight of the snipers and i cant even duck behind a clown car to avoid them

On tumblr you’re in the clown car, hurtling towards a cliff at mach 3 with a few dozen others in the same car.

See, it’s metaphors like these that you can only get on Tumblr, that perfectly describe what it’s like being on Tumblr.

amongthespaghetti:

slab-o-meat:

*over the loudspeaker at ikea* FIRST BLOOD

i think if i, in the flesh, heard that in an ikea some primal part of me would break out and smash a norrnäs over the closest person’s head

3drod:

Short skit I made for the Newgrounds Smash Bros Collab

ukiyoin:

I’m losing my mind over the new sasuke meme

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